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Sunday, February 23, 2020

The Short and Sweet Version of Holy Shit

The Short and Sweet Version of Holy Shit

Once a preacher childishly was shocked to learn that loving the Lord required much more than Christian humility.  Upon landing where the Lord had sent him, he learned that the denomination's mob bosses had a little off the books ceremony to assure loyalty (as Trump would define it).  Of course this involved a little sexual ceremony that would ruin him if disclosed.  This brave little minister simply would not sodomize others. They offered him a teaching position, but he was sure the Lord had called him to ministry.  To her dying day his wife recalled the sarcasm dripping from the announcement that they had "scoured the state" before determining he was the perfect fit for the job in a child orphanage community.

But that ain't all, photos on my father over time plainly reveal that though he would not sodomize (which if committed would have left his face alone while hardening his heart--willing to "pull the trigger" on wimps otherwise known as saints) he was by threat of extortion forced to be sodomized.  As only half the ceremony was done during rituals, within 5 years of connection he developed faggot facial characteristics--features quite absent from photo's taken some five years earlier at Union Theological Seminary. All clearly indicative of the criminality of forced sex in a workplace environment.  (Yes, my campaign for the presidency will uncover a shitload of basic surprises. We will learn that corruption in the bedroom can lead like a trash chute to corruption in finances.)

All White Collar Deviants -- God Welcomes You to the MISSION FIELD:

In a  few brief months United Methodist will need to determine their position on sodomy--the default position will endorse sodomy as sublimely hunky dory.  To opt out of sodomy (the Biblical view) ONE MUST break off from The United Methodist Church and enter a brand new denomination for those insisting on a view faithful to the Bible.  Well, now we can better see how Methodist clergy are hip on the modernist view.