What Are Unhealthy Thoughts?--The Key Question

When unhealthy thoughts enter your mind, what have you found helpful in dealing with them? (Serendipity Bible Fourth Edition, page 1575).

I would change the above statement to read "When unfriendly thoughts enter your mind...." for indeed unhealthy thoughts are hurtful to yourself or others and are therefore profoundly unfriendly thoughts. Now the great feat is to discern which thoughts are truly unfriendly, and this is not an obvious or easy task.  Many thoughts can masquerade as righteous (even appearing our very conscience) which are in fact hurtful.  

Shirzad Chamine in Positive Intelligence identifies key unfriendly lies whispered to us by our mind patterns (which he calls Saboteurs).  To quote examples: Without me pushing you, you will get lazy and complacent (the Judge Saboteur); This is a personal obligation. It is up to me to fix whatever mess I encounter (the Stickler); I don't do this for myself. I help others selflessly and don't expect anything in return. The world would be better if everyone did the same (the Pleaser); Life is about achieving and producing results. Portraying a good image helps me achieve results. Feelings are just a distraction and don't help anything (the Hyper-Achiever); Sadness is a noble and sophisticated thing that shows exceptional depth, insight, and sensitivity (the Victim); Life is full of dangers. If I don't look out for them who will? (the Hyper-Vigilant); Life is too short. It must be lived fully. I don't want to miss out (the Restless); Without me, you can't get much done. You need to push people (the Controller); You are a good person to spare others' feelings (the Avoider).  [From pages 35-49. The relevant Saboteurs are noted in the parentheses I added above.]  They "...[for example the Judge] are the internal enemies. They are a set of automatic and habitual mind patterns, each with its own voice, beliefs, and assumptions that work against your best interest" (page 16).  In short, all of the thoughts above are used by your Saboteurs in unfriendly and hurtful ways, all the while lying--pretending that they are your very conscience embedded as it were by God.

I included the extensive quotes above for I think it very important--in fact the most important aspect of today's question--not to assume feelings of guilt are reliable guides in avoiding the unhealthy.  Guilt and its various sly intimidations can be used by unhealthy mind patterns to keep us from achieving positive spiritual growth and effective behavior.

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Hearing the Sound of the Spirit

What does it mean to be led by the Spirit"? [See quote from Romans below.] How does the Spirit help us fight our battles? Give an example. (Serendipity Bible Forth Edition, page 1575).

Romans 8:14-15 (NIV)

For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”

The leading of the Spirit is one the most important yet most treacherous concepts in Christianity.  How do we know we are being led by the Spirit rather than by secretively selfish, hurtful motives? It is tempting to quickly respond that if the direction indicated breaks the Golden Rule, then it must not be of the Spirit; yet we have the image of Abraham obeying God and both ready and willing to kill his son in sacrifice.  That is, obeying God (the first commandment) sometimes seems to conflict and trump the second and like commandment--the Golden Rule.  An issue long wrestled with by earnest folk is war and the nature of battle.  In war to conquer evil we must hate and kill our enemy rather than love them.  No one promises that Christianity is a sure-fire sedative to moral anxieties as we have seen demonstrated time and again in wrecked human psyches.  

In all seriousness I come down to a rather unsatisfactory conclusion regarding when we know we are being led by the Spirit (and in this I am assuming an earnest-seeking, experienced believer).  It is the fairly reliable test we find when an accomplished artist says--"I know a good work of art when I see/hear it"--an observation enhanced by mastery.  In many ways the pilgrim's journey lays the foundation and seasoning for hearing rightly the Holy Spirit.  

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Staying Calm and Collected as a Vice

In light of your own struggles with sin, how do you feel about Paul's conflict?  [See quote from Romans below.] How is this a model for a healthy, realistic self-image? How is it a model for taking appropriate responsibility? (Serendipity Bible Fourth Edition, page 1575).

Romans 7:15...19  (NIV)

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.... For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.  For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 

Laid-back defined:  informal relaxed and easygoing: a shaggy dog with an engaging, laid-back temperament. (New Oxford American Dictionary).

My greatest sinful desire is to be laid-back at all times and at any cost.  I guess I just haven't outgrown my teenage desire to be "cool".  In our car when I was a teen I ran over my dog.  It occurred about two blocks from the house and a peer was present.  I could see Skippy injured, bleeding out of the mouth underneath the car.  Cool me, I sauntered home and told Dad what I had done and if would go take a look while I stayed at the house.  I told him he had better take the rifle.  It looked that bad.  Some minutes later Dad returned to say the dog was already dead.  To this day I regret that during my dog's last moments I was coolly sauntering home to impress myself and my peer rather than comforting Skippy during his last moments.  But boy was I cool!

How many times before and since have I withdrawn my hand from someone in need or turned my head from tragedy just to remain my cool, laid-back self rather than getting mad as hell about some injustice or becoming hotly exercised about some callus criminality in progress.  Being laid-back as a predominant lifestyle has a pervasive dampening and dulling effect on empathy and compassion.  So the devil temps me most not with sensational sin, but with bland, profound complacency.  Having watched 1776, I would say I need to take a daily, double dose of John Adams. 

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Limited Validation

When you were a teenager, what was one of your biggest struggles? (Serendipity Bible Fourth Edition, page 1574).

One of my favorite places is Bowling Green, FL.  We moved there from Ellenton, Fl, when I was 14 years old.  In Ellenton I had friends like Steve Martin.  Often we would ride our bikes together on various adventures.  We were close friends and were regularly in each other's company.  After arriving in Bowling Green for whatever reason I did not bond with a close friend.  I had acquaintances about my age but no one with whom to regularly confide and be myself.  Thus, a struggle I had to deal with was a feeling of isolation.  The high school was in a neighboring city--Wauchula--and I rode the bus to school.  Thus, I tended to see many people only at school.  I was reserved, not to say shy, and this compounded the problem.  I know that I am not alone in this experience and share a commonality with many.    

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The Candid Camera Coward

When have you been tempted to bail out of a stormy situation and slip away in a lifeboat? What happened? What did you learn? (Serendipity Bible Fourth Edition, page 1564).

Today is Labor Day--a day I like to reminisce about the good ol' days when I worked for the City of Saint Petersburg.  I will never forget what happened one quiet Sunday afternoon when everyone was off work in Leisure Services except those working special events.  I had left a personal item at the work office and I decided to retrieve it that Sunday (though I was one of those who was off).  Now the security system for the Leisure Services facility is top-notch.  I thought perhaps a special events person would be there that weekend, and I could gain access to the building.  My wife Kathy was with me, but she stayed in the car while I went around the corner to the back door of the building.  I tried the door... and it was unlocked!  I proceeded to enter and the alarm warning immediately started sounding.  I panicked, bolted out the door, and quickly retraced my steps.  (The proper course of action would have been for me to remain in the building, find a co-worker there, and have them disable the alarm timer.)  As I say, I bolted out the door and hotfooted it out of the building, joined Kathy in the car, and sped away.  Monday, I thought better of my actions and admitted what I had done to my boss Mark.  Mark went directly to the video record made by the security camera equipment... and there I was like a weasel cravenly scurrying away.  Jeff my good friend and coworker was also my political nemeses.  We couldn't agree about anything regarding political affairs; and I too often came off as the liberal wimp.  Well Jeff delighted in the video--my "profile in courage" as he called it.  Lord, those were the days!

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Money Talks, Bullshit Walks

[Money Talks, Bullshit Walks means] that cheap talk will get you nowhere, while money will persuade people to do as you like.
(http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Money%20Talks%2C%20Bullshit%20Walks)

James 2:14-26 New International Version (NIV)

What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

Actually, bullshit blathers but money walks--money puts legs beneath our dreams and desires.  Money is the great facilitator--leveraging our desires into action.  Most recently I wanted to take a course at the University of South Florida (Saint Petersburg).  My desire for education alone without money to pay for tuition and books had no legs to get me where I wanted to go. It was not until I wrote a check that I became enrolled in the course.  Lets' face it, you've got to love any tool that has the capacity to move forward your deepest desires.  But like any well-designed tool, it is indifferent to how it is used.  Like a hatchet, it can be wielded for good or ill.  I've grown to love money for its facilitating qualities.  Yet how it is actually used is dependent upon the user's spiritual core--not on the mere tool which has no meaning apart from the human mind and spirit that wields it.

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A Reliable Forecast

In terms of a weather report, how would you describe your life at present? Your life five years ago? (Serendipity Bible Fourth Edition, page 1564).

I have a friend I see often.  When I ask how he's doing he reliably replies "Sunny to partly cloudy."  That sums up well the reality of life as I generally find it--life is by its very nature a combination of the sweet and sour--life is reliably bitter-sweet.  Thus to pretend that it's all "sunny side up" seems unrealistic; but unrelieved gloom seems somehow self-indulgent and unrealistic too--as if you demand unrelieved sunshine in an inherently sunny to partly cloudy world.

Anxiety, stress, and worry hovering like gloomy clouds will be dispersed most effectively by action--we can't do everything, but we can enlist help and together do the best that we can do.  It is remarkable how often the "best possible" slides into home as more than sufficient.

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